[Blog Train] How I Met Your Father
I’ve always been curious about how a couple first met, how they fell in love and what made them want to spend the rest of their lives together. I’ve asked my parents about their love story and I believe Laurent will ask us about it in the future as well. So before my memory fail me and I start to forget all the little details of our love story (and where I kept all my old photos), I thought it’s an opportune time for me to hop onto the “How I Met Your Father” Blog Train hosted by Michelle, to document down how our own little love story began <3
So Laurent, this is for you, when you’re old enough to ponder about finding love and your better half 🙂
Way Back When…
It didn’t feel that long, but when I did a quick count of the years I’ve known Wayne, I realised we’ve been together for a good NINE years!
It started back when we were in NUS. I was studying Psychology in FASS and he was doing the Real Estate course in SDE, one street apart. Our paths might have crossed before we even noticed each other because I often visited my girlfriend, who was studying in SDE, for lunch or just to hang out. But for the first year of our uni lives, we were both in a long and steady relationship with our then partners so we were pretty much still strangers in each other’s lives.
I regained my single status when I broke up with my then boyfriend and decided to take things slow from then on and enjoy singlehood since my previous relationship was almost 5 years long.
I relished in the company of my family and my girlfriends, caught up with old pals, went out with friends, met new people and in the midst of all these activities, our paths crossed for the first time (or at least, that’s the first time we had any interactions).
It was a clubbing outing (I feel old saying the word “clubbing”) with the people from SDE and he stood out quite prominently because 1. He is really tall, 2. He had blonde hair and 3. One of his arms was in a cast.
What a way to make a first impression right? I wished I had photos to show, but I probably didn’t take any photos that day or they might have been uploaded in the now defunct Friendster and lost for good in cyberspace.
Anyway, we didn’t really talk or have much (if any) one-to-one interaction that day so at that point we were still “my friend’s friend”.
Besides my dear girlfriend, whom I always say is our unofficial matchmaker, it was the love for good food and good conversations that really brought us together.
We started meeting up in a smaller group with a couple of common friends (over food, of course), and that was when we started to have more interactions. I think the first time we met in such a setting was for dessert at Ah Chew. Even from the first time we officially chatted, we felt like we have known each other for ages. I know a lot of women find humour attractive, but I find knowledge to have an even greater draw. And Wayne has this strange ability to contribute to ANY topic under the sun because he always seems to know a thing or two about… well, everything!
We started meeting up alone when others in the group can’t make it or when he offered to meet me for supper after my dance practices (which happened pretty often) and things kind of just took off from there. We could sit for hours at our favourite supper haunts, eating and chatting about anything that comes to mind and sometimes even having deep discussions about intriguing issues. Honestly, there was never a dull moment.
He had also just parted from his ex after a long relationship and I guess that was one more similarity we shared which allowed us to understand and empathise with each other in ways others can’t and we became each other’s emotional support on our road to recovery.
The meet-ups, suppers and conversations carried on for a few months and it was evident we truly enjoyed each other’s company. I almost felt like I was in a relationship again because of all the time we were spending together, but I knew very clearly I wanted to take a break from the matters of the heart and just enjoy being really good friends.
Along the way, he started dropping hints that he wants to go into a serious relationship and it wasn’t long before he made his confession.
It was a hot, sweltering afternoon in June when he told me he wanted to meet for dinner but I think I sensed something was coming so I told him I was only available before dinner. He picked me up all the same and we went for dessert at Esplanade’s Max Brenner, a place I’ve been wanting to try for the longest time but have never told anyone. It was almost like one of our usual meet-ups except that, thinking back, we had a lot of “filler activities” like walking around the Esplanade and even all the way to Clifford Pier (under the crazy heat!) to kill time. I guess he was trying to find the right time to broach the topic.
When we finally made it back to the car, he pulled out a bouquet of lilies from the boot and handed it to me, with a smile. We sat in the car and he started talking about some stuff which I barely heard because I was busy trying to make sense of the situation. The one sentence that finally caught my attention was, “I want to woo you.”
I know it’s quite a mood-killer but my first reaction was an uncontrollable laugh before I asked, “WHO STILL USES THE WORD WOO?!” It quickly turned into a light-hearted banter and I could sense that he was relived after getting those words out. But technically, it was the correct word to use. At least he didn’t say I want to CHASE you.
I told him I’m not ready to go into a serious relationship yet and he replied, “I know. That was why I didn’t ask will you be my girlfriend, because I didn’t think you will answer yes immediately. But I will still woo you all the same.”
I was moved by what he said after realising how much thought he put into finding the right words for the moment. Unfortunately, I burst out laughing at the word “woo” again.
sealed with a kiss
A couple of months later, on 090807, I finally gave in to his advances and accepted my new status as his girlfriend, under the fireworks.
We were in a serious relationship for 5 years before we exchanged vows. During these 5 years, God took the time to help us grow in the relationship and learn to become each other’s better half, emotional pillar, spiritual support and lifelong soul mate.
He popped the question in Jan 2012, in the presence of my closest girlfriends and we tied the knot in Dec that same year.
They say a relationship changes after the “wooing” stage. Of course the relationship changes when it reaches different stages, but the people in the relationship, shouldn’t have changed. Maybe a little more mature, a little more understanding, a little less impulsive, but deep within, they are still the same.
We still enjoy nice meals and quality conversations. I am still (secretly) impressed by his ability to contribute to any topic under the sun. I appreciate how he has always been supportive of my passions, from dance to baking to calligraphy. I may not always enjoy it but I’m thankful to him for always pushing me to challenge myself. I still love him for the way he is decisive and assertive without losing respect for me (like the way he tells me he wants to WOO me) and I still look at him in admiration for the man that he is.
So Laurent, when you are emotionally ready and knows that God has placed a special someone in your life, mummy’s only words of advice to you is to always be true. Be true to your heart and be true to her. You don’t have to paint a fairy tale for anyone because God writes our love story better than ANY fairy tales. Show her who you really are so that she falls in love with the real you. So that no matter which stage you are at in a relationship, the two of you are still in love with the same person you fell in love with.
This post is part of a Blog Train – How I Met Your Father, hosted by Michelle from The Chill Mom. Click on the button below to join a group of mom bloggers on our trip down memory lane as we share about how our love stories began 🙂
Next up on the blog train happens to be one of my dearest girlfriend, Ashlyn!
Ashlyn shares her walk of faith, love and joy as a full time working mummy to 1. Many years back, she prayed for a child but God didn’t send her one immediately. Instead, He waited and blessed her with a daughter at the perfect timing. He continued to be her center of life, guide and lead her new journey. She writes about her life, faith, parenting, child, travel and crafting “adventures” – yes, many ups & downs! More over at www.ashlynthia.blogspot.com